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I would like to clarify an issue relating to parental control in my article ‘Non-violent resistance’ (Therapy Today, September 2008)
Clarifying parental control
I would like to clarify an issue relating to parental control in my article ‘Non-violent resistance’ (Therapy Today, September 2008). In the first sentence after the heading ‘A non-violent response’, the article reads: ‘NVR removes the directive to parents to resist control of the young person.’ This should have read: ‘NVR removes the directive to parents to attempt to control the young person.’
The concept of taking control is changed from the need to control their child to taking control of their own behaviour, including not being controlled by their child. This changing of the object of control has beneficial consequences for all, especially in reducing escalation fuelled by a parental belief that they need to make their child ‘behave’. And also in parents and therapists being able to measure short-term outcomes in terms of parental factors (including increased self-esteem) rather than immediate changes in child behaviour.Mary Newman, MBACP (Snr Accred) Clinical Lead, Thanet Multi-Agency Service, Margate
